I have this thought that keeps popping in my mind.Is there truly a such thing as sacred relationships?I just finished reading An Afrocentric Guide To A Spiritual Union By; Ra Un Nefer Amen for the umpteenth time and I can't help but wonder if this is really possibly in todays society.I mean everywhere you look there are ads for chat rooms,and dating sites.Even on TV ,especially late nite you can go to just about any basic channel and see sex line this,chat line that,let's meet here all kinds of corruptive crap.With all these "come and get it" shots can there ever truly be a scared relationship? When men see these ads ,they may not act on it but if their staring at it ,or comment on someone,or they just might not say anything at all but you know they didn't shut their eyes.Isn't he or she lusting ?So I say How can their ever be a true sacred spiritual union in the black community?Out of all the people I know ,family,friends,co-works not one of them is in a sacred relationship or has ever had one.
Just something to make you say hmmm................
Sacred Unions
Mawiyah Kai EL-Jamah Bomani
I read the book several times (love it) and feel blessed to be married for 12 years and find myself working (along with my husband) daily towards keeping the union sacred. Incidentally it was his book, he had purchased it long before we were married. We (my husband and I) have to remind ourselves of the little things like keeping the compromises going so that each individual can achieve their maximum potential and be true to his and her destiny. The idea of a sacred union is constantly being molded and analyzed in our home. We find that when each person has their own individual dreams met then the team breathes easy. On the other hand when I talk with my sister (who I suggested share the book with her husband and self) it is apparent that society's oversaturation with appealing to our animalistic natures causes many couples to regress rather than progress towards a unified front. She and her husband live more by a dog eat dog mantra and would rather race each other to the finish line rather than recognize the optimum success in forging an alliance to see each individual to his or her goal. This type of thinking would advance the team and create more harmony in the bedroom-which incidentally has been neglected. I think it sometimes seems impossible because we (in society) are in constant conflict with a world that would rather have us at war (with our mates, children, coworkers) when we are disengaged from the real issues plaguing society we become easy targets for media induces psychosis. When we aspire to live like, look like and exist in a world similiar to what we witness in soap operas and our favorite tv dramasd we run the risk of catching media induced psychosis which has been known to debilitate any type of union. I felt like I was all over the place but I so wanted to respond to your wonderful post and for the past days needed to get out my thoughts.
Ase
Laughing Out Loud...with Relief
Thanks for sharing...I was over here sweating after that last one...wondering if I had presumed, assumed...spoken out of turn....only to learn I debate with the 'sacred' law. I look forward to your next post. Peace, hugs, kisses, and blessings to you and your family.
Is it hot in here?:)
... my sister, I am honored and blessed by your willingness to address these issues. Particularly if you are not in a committed relationship and wish to settle in your mind how you would approach such a 'break' in the 'sacredness'. And thanks for stopping by the page and encouraging me to nurture what we have. That is received.
As long as our spirit resides in bodily form, there will always be a "But". "But, I need to eat and feed my children..."But, I am tired and in need of rest..."But this has angered me and I must work through it....."But, he/she is foin!...
If you don't mind me sharing, my mate and I decided in the beginning to let the 'purpose' of the marriage win against all temptations. And what temptation will break a union is decided by the couple and it is between them and God.
Executing this IS NOT EASY....when either one of us is confronted with situations you bring out in this last comment. So far, honesty and a tough facing of REALITY is what has put us over the top. Some might not agree, but we see each other as human beings who cannot live in a spiritually meditative state at all times. We will make mistakes (in thoughts, words, or deeds) that violate the the 'sacredness' of a union ---JUST as we do when we are not with a mate and supposedly honoring a code set by the God/Gods --- on the wagon one day---off the next. I find it funny that when we unite with others we expect a much higher level of consistency.
In any case, for me, the 'sacredness' is what we have when we are in that beautiful place. And it is what sustains us when we are not. Forgiveness provides the bridge for the darker But? moments and only when this has been tested will a couple have to face the true substance of the union. Much like ourselves, I believe the upright relationship is designed to strengthen through times of trial, testing, and inevitable change. So far, we've survived a few tests that have sent us runnig back to our spiritual and 'sacred' place--that purpose that defines the union. And we feel responsible for that no matter what.
It is my hope - since we got a lot o' years left together - that as the tempations come, we will continue to abide in this vain. Encouragement, intercessions, and love from sisters like yourself are definitely helpful. Stay honest. It is your strength.
Thanks Again
I guess you told me! LOL,no really you put it well.As a matter of fact I am married,have been for 16 years,coming up on 17 really soon.I see you never would of guessed it from my writing.I just had finished reading Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union and it just had me stumped.I guess all of Ra Un Amen books does that.He writes in a way that will have you saying is this really possible.See the comment you just wrote would be my thoughts too,but if I go by his teachings in this book,it totally contradicts it and says that if any of these things occur than it's not truly a sacred union.Anyway ,I just wanted to see someone else's op ion.If you think this was bad Waite until I re-read Meter Netur and post. Thanks Sistah Peace, Indigo
Great topic...and ONLY because...
...my marriage is a witness to such a thing can I say that 'sacred relationships' do exist. It is designed to serve God's purposes and not our own. It is divine and simple. It is nexplicable at times, and it is something that I have learned to humble myself to over 13 years ago- --still learning. It is a gift and the spirit of this form of love cannot be exploited on the canvas of the world-wide web, self-help books, friendly advice, or pulpits across religious disciplines.
It can only be known if the two involved are willing to be known before each other as intimately as they are willing to be known before whatever God they serve (and that's pretty intimate). It can only be appreciated and approached with gratitude and acceptance.
That said, it is not without problems, occasional mis-understandings, hurts, and dissapointments (keepin' it real). But through them all, the relationship 'is'. And I will always be grateful to share my life with one who SEES me in all of my splendor and all of my pain...in all of my beautiful and all of my ugly and chooses, still, to say to the world "for better or worse, that's my woman."
Great topic...and ONLY because...
Your comments on this subject is exactly what I believed to be what sacred relationships are supposed to be about but when you speak to people and the subject of marriages ect.come up always I find at the end is a but.But this or that.So I guess what I'm saying is ,isn't it the but that takes the sacredness away from the relationship ? Yes,it's the creators plan but is it really?I mean in every spiritual practice there is some type of laws,covens,restrictions ect.to live by and if these laws are broken then isn't the relationship no longer sacred? I guess it just seems to me that with all this (Sex Shopping) out here even if it is looking ,cause who can't help to see it,how can one really have a sacred union.If lust enters the picture ,which usually happens when your visually stimulated or fantasizing it breaks the covens and removes the sacredness.I don't know if I'm explaining this well enough so here's a little example.Ok,say you see a guy that's cutt-upp and fine as can be.Big biceps,broad shoulders the works and you give him a extra long look.You never say anything and your paths never cross again.In essence your lusting and to lust for another who isn't your mate is an violation of whatever sacrement you follow.Or is it? That is one of the things I miss about Islam.When iI was a practing muslim there wasn't much adultry or sex in your face so to speak.Everyone was modestly dressed if not completely covered and everyones focus seemed to be on a more spiritual level,as fas as relationships are concerned.Now the three wives thing ,that's a whole other subject. It just makes me say hmm.Thanks for the comments,I really value your point of view.
Peace,
Indigo
INTERESTING..
THIS IS INTERESTING , BUT THE SACRED RELATIONSHIP DOES EXIST AND IS REALLY REAL.
ALL THE THINGS THAT YOU MENTIONED ARE DISTRACTIONS THAT HAVE EXISTED SINCE THE BEGGINING OF TIME THAT HAVE TAKEN A DIFFERENT FORM. REMEMBER THIS.."ALL ENERGY IS CONSTANT". WHICH MEANS THERE WILL ALWAYS BE WHAT WAS AND SINCE THE SACRED WAS A FEMALE/MALE FORCE THAT HISTORICALLY WAS, SO SHALL IT BE ACCORDING TO YOUR BELIEF. (IN THE IMAGE OF GOD WERE THEY CREATED MAN AND WOMAN HE CREATED THEM).-GENESIS
WHAT YOUR SAYING ABOUT OUR COMMUNITY IS A SHAME,A DISGRACE, BUT IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH WHAT IS SACRED. THE THINGS YOU MENTIONED ARE THE FRUITS OF A BABYLONIAN SOCIETY, ABSENT OF THE MALE AND FEMALE GOD TO GOVERN GUIDE AND INSPIRE.
SINCE THE SACRED AINT NOTHING TO BE PLAYED WITH OFFER IT YOUR COMPLETE RESPECT AND ITS MANIFESTATION SHALL BE GRANTED UNTO YOU ,YOU; LIKE ALL THE WISE SOULS IVE EVER MET TOLD ME, THE FIRST STEP IS BELIEF.
BLESS.
Became Become Becomming is expressive of RasTafarI that Became for INI To Become the freedom that is most Becomming of US.